Terry Thomas Chocolate Clockwork Orange Edition
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<h2>Top Story</h2>
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<li>[url=https://www.axios.com/2026/08/28/stripe-advent-end-paypal-pursuit]Stripe has decided maybe they won't buy PayPal after all.[/url] (Axios)<br />
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Apparently they got it confused with some place in Italy.<br />
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<li>[url=https://www.axios.com/2026/08/28/china-ai-data-center-backlash-bots]China is secretly fueling America's datacenter rage.[/url] (Axios)<br />
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The guys pushing for all the datacenters are making it easy for them, though.</li>
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<h2>Tech News</h2>
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<li>Database binary is 5M. Language is <span style="text-decoration-line: line-through;">1.2M</span> 1.5M. Both squish by 60% using UPX and seem to run just fine. The language will probably be pushing 5M as well by the time it's done and has a standard library, but that also seems fine - a 100 millisecond download.<br />
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Next step is to point the language at the database and rebuild my personal blog. If that works well, others will follow.<br />
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Database<br />
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<li>Combined SQL / NoSQL</li>
<li>Operates embedded and/or as a server</li>
<li>Role-based authentication</li>
<li>Nested data with or without schema enforcement</li>
<li>Two search engines (simple and full-featured)</li>
<li>Two procedure languages (Lua and a custom Ruby-like)</li>
<li>Geospatial queries on points and boxes (no complex shapes)</li>
<li>Table-level queues</li>
<li>Row-level queues</li>
<li>Named KV stores</li>
<li>Temporal tables (system versioning)</li>
<li>Automated expiry of literally anything</li>
<li>Sparse indexes</li>
<li>Multi-valued indexes</li>
<li>Types and views implemented as macros</li>
<li>Graph queries</li>
<li>Tail queries (live feeds)</li>
<li>Instant schema updates (all records are versioned against the schema and all schema versions are kept while records exist for that version)</li>
<li>One-click replication - no dump and load, just authenticate and wait for the green light<br />
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<li>Client libraries for Ada, C++, Elixir, Go, Java, Lua, Node, ObjectPascal, Perl, PHP, Python 2.7 and 3.6+, Ruby, Rust, and Swift</li>
<li>5MB binary; 12MB with advanced search</li>
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Language<br />
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<li>Contracts</li>
<li>Concurrency</li>
<li>Coherence</li>
<li>Capabilities</li>
<li>Ruby <span style="font-style: italic;">syntax </span>but Rust <span style="font-style: italic;">semantics</span></li>
<li>Built on Rust but because it inherits Rust's safety checks for free in its runtime, compiles to bytecode 100x faster than Rust (I actually measure this)</li>
<li>Compile once and run anywhere the single runtime binary exists</li>
<li>Incremental compilation with strict boundaries making compiles even faster</li>
<li>Static or dynamic linking</li>
<li>Acts as its own embedded scripting language - same syntax, just a subset</li>
<li>Erlang-style supervisors</li>
<li>Maybe fast?</li>
<li>A package manager that doesn't treat you as a goat to be ritually sacrificed<br />
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<li>[url=https://edition.cnn.com/2026/08/28/business/states-prediction-markets-gambling-federal-appeals-court]The Ninth Circuit has ruled that gambling is gambling and can be regulated as gambling.[/url] (CNN)<br />
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Seems correct to me.<br />
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<li>[url=https://techcrunch.com/2026/08/27/openai-anthropic-google-and-100-other-companies-call-for-action-to-defend-against-rogue-ai/]OpenAI, Anthropic, Google, and a hundred other rogue AIs have called to band together to protect themselves against the public and private sector.[/url] (Tech Crunch)<br />
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Huh.<br />
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<li>[url=https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2026/aug/28/us-court-rules-pentagon-anthropic-ban-illegal-trump-claude-ai]The Pentagon's classification of supply-chain risk Anthropic as a supply-chain risk posed a supply-chain risk to Anthropic, says federal judge... You have got to be shitting me.[/url] (The Guardian)<br />
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The script writers for this season are getting lazy.<br />
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<li>[url=https://vancouver.citynews.ca/2026/08/27/canada-recruits-dozens-of-foreign-scientists-researchers-poaching-many-from-u-s/]Canada has "poached" literally dozen of "scientists" from the US.[/url] (CityNews)<br />
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You can tell how sciencey they are from the foam.<br />
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<li>[url=https://www.tomshardware.com/tech-industry/artificial-intelligence/claude-nukes-a-developers-700-gb-home-directory-while-testing-a-script-to-ensure-it-wouldnt-do-so-automatic-model-downgrade-may-have-contributed-to-the-screw-up]Idiots on PCs losing data.[/url] (Tom's Hardware)<br />
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I use Claude. I have a specific WSL instance set up for it. If it deletes it, I lose maybe an hour to reinstall the whole environment and pull the code back from Git.<br />
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<li>[url=https://www.tomshardware.com/tech-industry/semiconductors/intel-14a-defect-density-is-dropping-faster-than-the-company-expected-we-have-not-seen-this-performance-since-22nm-says-cfo]Intel's 14A defect density is dropping faster than expected. Here's why that's a good thing.[/url] (Tom's Hardware)<br />
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Uh... Because defects are bad and having fewer of them is good?<br />
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<li>[url=https://www.tomshardware.com/tech-industry/big-tech/cloudflare-frees-100tb-of-ram-by-shrinking-dns-cache-entries]How Cloudflare saved 100TB of RAM on its 1.1.1.1 DNS service.[/url] (Tom's Hardware)<br />
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They started out with 250TB of RAM.<br />
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<li>[url=https://wccftech.com/tsmc-bonuses-surge-50-and-outpace-revenue-growth-as-sec-filings-expose-the-ai-talent-wars-real-cost/]The math ain't mathing.[/url] (WCCFTech)[quote]During the second quarter, TSMC paid out NT$36 billion in bonuses, which marked a 50.6% growth over the year ago figure of NT$35 billion.[/quote]No. I don't think it did.<br />
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<h2>Musical Interlude</h2>
<div>[ytlite=cCYGyg1H56s]</div>
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<div><span style="font-style: italic;">Disclaimer: Stop the beguine, I want to get off!</span></div>